Community Applied - Part 4

I was going back over my posts about community and felt like something was missing. I outlined what the "ideal" of sorts could look like. However, I don't live in my "ideal" and I honestly don't know how to.

I am trying to be more intentional about relationships which is all community really is. In this post I want to share what I am doing now, and what I am hoping to see it become.

What I am doing now.

In a previous post I talked about "Operation Catchup" where I was being systematic about staying in contact with old friends. That is part of the fulfilment of my relationship goals, but being that they are all far away it is hard to do much more than keep in touch. My life would be rather empty if that's all the friendship connection I had.

The other part is being intentional about creating and building friendships here. I have never had a large number of friends, but I have also never been particularly intentional about making friends either. For the most part all I have ever done was be friends with people who I basically tripped over. I had one kid I was friends with growing up who I just decided that I wanted to be his friend and pursued it. And you know what? It worked. We weren't best buds forever, but it was a real friendship. It requires putting yourself out there, but it can be done.

Here in Maryland I have been doing that more. I've identified people who I admire and respect and am in the process of making a point to be their friend. It's hard to know how close a friend they will be, but I've yet to have anyone just shut me down and not want to connect.

To be more practical here are the GROUNDBREAKING things I'm doing to connect and get to know people:

1.       Texting them periodically

2.       Eating lunch together

3.       Having them over for dinner and games (including their families of course)

4.       Trying to have actual conversations with them when I see them at church

5.       Participate in activities in order to interact (softball, men's Bible study, games at the local game store)

I've done these things in the past on some level, but not as part of an overall goal of finding friends. Time will tell I guess how it will work, but it's going well so far.

What I hope to see.

I want to have a good group of friends. I don't have a specific number in mind. I'll take as many as stick.

I want the relationships to be close and comfortable. Where we are able to share our lives with each other without it being weird, and ask for help without feeling awkward.

It's odd seeing it written like that, but it's what I want.

Have you ever been intentional about making friends? How did it go?