Goals vs Systems - Part 1

We are told to make goals and write them down. To make them SMART and organized. However, there are some decided downsides to goals which make me lean more towards focusing on systems instead.

Downsides to goals:

1. People aren't good at them. New years resolutions have terrible reputations for people succeeding and that is the biggest point at which goals are made in life. 90% of people fail and a full third of them have dropped it by the end of January.
2. You are always failing (unless you succeed). Think about it, if you want to lose 20 lbs you put yourself into a state of failing at your goal up until the point you succeed. But if you don't make it, even if you lost 17 lbs, you fail. That's not a good way to feel like you won.
3. It's a let down even when you succeed. When you reach a goal there is a two and a half second surge of joy and excitement followed by the realization that you have to find a new goal to possibly fail at.
4. It is a system where you institutionalize discontentment. You can't be happy unless you have this thing you don't have. And referring back to number 3 if you do get there you have to put the measuring stick further down the road and start the process all over. And if you fail, you are now just a failure.

 Don't get me wrong, successful people strive to be better in a very organized way. Some of them even do it using such an archaic and masochistic method as goal setting, but you are better than that. You can use the sure fire method that I have been using for literally DAYS.

I'll tell you more next time. You are going to find this interesting.

Weekly Review

A tool that I have begun to use to aid in my intentionality is a weekly goal review. The past few weeks I have taken twenty minutes or so to sit down and go over my goals and write up a short analysis of how I did progressing towards that goal for the week. I am finding that it is a very helpful routine to go through.

It helps me identify areas where I am not making progress like I would like. These regular reviews help me to make corrections and try to adapt my approach to try to better meet my goals. Being every week things can't get to far off before I notice and hopefully can make some change.

It also helps encourage me that I am making progress. Even looking at my notes over the past few weeks I can already see changes in a number of areas and that motivates me to continue working and trying.

I think it can help me to begin noticing patterns as well. As more time passes I am going to be able to look back and notice themes and trends that will hopefully inform my ability to further improve my strategies for getting closer to my goals.

Here are the questions I ask myself for each goal item:
1. What went well?
2. Why did it go well?
3. What went poorly?
4. Why did it go poorly?
5. What can I do next week to do better?

The feedback loop on this is really one of the most important parts of my process. I need to be able to look back and see how I have been doing so I can know if I am succeeding and if I am getting better.

What kind of feedback loops or self analysis do you do? Do you find it helpful?

Skilled vs Unskilled

To preface this I need to say that while this blog is generally about intentionality as we are applying it to our lives I also want to use it as a place that I can stretch my mental muscles in regards to other topics. It still is more practically intentional by continuing to develop my writing skills as well as aiding in my learning consistency by writing every day... all that to say I'm writing about economics and social theory today.

The workforce has developed and changed significantly over the past several decades. It wasn't that long ago that there were a lot of very good paying jobs doing things that did not require a large amount specific skills or training. These jobs resided primarily in manufacturing and other industrial fields. The reason for this was that these industries were producing high value products like cars and steel and they required a lot of human interaction to keep the machines and other processes functioning. Because of the high value of the products coupled with organized labor these relatively unskilled jobs were able to provide a good wage.

Sidenote: I am defining "unskilled" in this context to mean there isn't any specialized training or college degree required. You could graduate high school and walk into an unskilled job.

As manufacturing began to get outsourced to take advantage of cheap labor overseas these jobs began to disappear here in the US, but they still existed. As time has progressed however, computers and robot automation has lead to a revolution in manufacturing processes as well as how almost all work is done. This has meant that for any application where there is a high value product (like cars as mentioned before) all the simple tasks that were done by unskilled labor int he past are now done by robots. The automotive industry still has lots of employees, but now they are highly skilled engineers and technicians who know how to operate and maintain high tech equipment.

This shift that this has brought about economically is profound. Today the only unskilled labor that exists for the most part is in very low value product markets, namely restaurants and retail where automation has not made very effective inroads. In these jobs the pay is very low because the final value of the products are low (in comparison to cars). So low in fact that it is really impossible to live off of the pay in most of these positions.

The trend here is only going to continue. Automation is going to improve. The number of jobs requiring little or no skill is going to continue to drop. Businesses like Amazon, Netflix, and Uber are going to disrupt traditional business models reducing unskilled staffing requirements. The irony here is that advocates of higher minimum wages while trying to improve the lot of poorly paid unskilled workers are only increasing the likelihood that those jobs will get streamlined and automated away.

The only real long term solution is to acknowledge that we are reaching a point where everyone has to become skilled labor. That doesn't mean we have to all be engineers and technicians, but it does mean that everyone will need to have some level of specialization that outstrips the abilities of our automation underlords. Not only that but we need to figure out a way to do this that doesn't involve everyone going $250k into college debt or even going to college at all.

Overall I think this is a good thing though. It means that instead of having a large portion of our workforce required for non-specialized unfun work we are becoming freed up to allow everyone to become skilled in something that hopefully they find interesting and rewarding. It will be an exciting adventure to get there.

50 Hours a Year

So I was talking to a friend of mine about the community posts and he suggested a method that he uses to build relationships, and I really like it. I have actually done this in the past, but not as part of an intentional system, it just kind of happened.

He sets aside his lunches and time before work to spend an hour each week with a number of friends. So every week he has several meal visits with friends that work on a recurring basis all year. So every year he spends about 50 hours with each one (hence the catchy title).

While it isn't a huge amount of time it is enough, especially given its consistency to really develop good relationships. He shared that over time enough relational capital is developed that some of the holes that I was bemoaning previously are filled. And thinking back to when I did it that really was the case.

So while it doesn't look like a perfect silver bullet to fix all my problems it does seem like a solid system to systematically improve the relationships that I feel I need.

Have you ever done this? How did you feel it went?

P.S. Many thanks to my friend for his wise input.

What vs How vs Why - Another look

So after posting yesterday's blog I started thinking about another way of looking at those three words. How does it apply to creating content and writing?

What you are doing is the realm of the now. The Facebook, twitter, Instagram flood of sharing. While it certainly can be educational and interesting, it is more often rather shallow. Not that that is bad per se, but too much is certainly not good.

How, can be very productive. Instructions to fix things, methods for improving life, 37 ways to write a killer resume, this is where the bulk of the solid content is. The internet is a hugely valuable tool for being able to learn how to do almost anything, we are all better off for it.

Why, is of course the deepest level again. This is where we find the heart of the matter. This is where we find psychology, philosophy, and religion, passion and conviction. This is where we explore the deepest level of understanding in order to draw out the kind of world or life we really want to see.

I believe good content in whatever form it takes has to touch all three of those questions. What needs to be done? How can we do it? Why is it important?

What vs How vs Why

As we have been exploring intentionality these past weeks I have started noticing the difference between focusing on what I do, how I do it, and why.

What, is obvious. It is what you are actually doing. The washing of dishes, the cleaning of messes, the having over of friends. It's tangible and apparent. However... if you don't look past that it is easy to get frustrated when the what is not going like you want.

How, while not quite as obvious is still often observable. However, when you get down to this level it starts to open up new paths and strategies for doing things better. I can keep the kids buys cleaning up the living room and dining room for long enough to get a full load of dishes into the dishwasher. This is good. It makes things go more smoothly and it can really make a difference as far as how much I get done.

Why, however can be a doozy. When we started this I had a list of my priorities. Things that were important to me and that were good and valuable. As we have gotten into this though I have realized that some things that I thought were priorities have started slipping down the list. Admittedly I had about ten so that was probably a bit much, but I'm learning so I started out generous. Some of them that are slipping should be. I don't like it, but as I've evaluated them I realized I needed to let them drop down. Others have dropped down not because I have made a reasoned evaluation, but because my actions have simply born them out. That hasn't been as good. However, it has created a real opportunity for me to do some self evaluation and explore what is lacking in those areas.

Any life adventure must be built upon a clear set of whys. If you don't know why you are doing what you are doing you are sailing without a compass.

How to Go on Dates

The root issue is really about priority. None of the issues we listed are insurmountable. They mostly point to a lack of priority and planning. It's hard to find the resources for anything last minute.

 

Here is the super-duper plan to always go on dates now and forever... or at least more often.

1. Do some pre-planning.  Surprise dates are nice, but realistically the basic format of a date can be predefined. A walk down the boardwalk, shopping games, or even the old standby dinner and a movie. Make a list of date ideas and just pick one whenever it's date planning time. We can even go so far as to put an approximate price tag on each one so that we know how much to budget.
2. Babysitting can be arranged. It would be nice if we had a bigger babysitter pool though. We haven't done a lot of searching however, so we need to put out feelers with our friends with little kids to see who sits on their kids. And if we do the planning a week or two in advance that makes it all work better too.
3. We may be busy, but we aren't THAT busy. We just need to decide that it is important and do it.

The key is to do the planning at a point where it isn't stressful (not the day before) and put enough of a framework in place so that when it comes to making the arrangements it is as easy a possible.

Now it's time to do!

P.S. First one is a movie date (Star Wars!)

Intentional Couple Time - Part 3: Dates? Real Dates? Together? No kids?

In the last 9 months, though probably much longer, we have gone out just the two of us, once. It's kinda sad, and needs to change. Our relationship as a couple is important, and should go beyond discussing finances, passing out sleeping in the same bed, and raising three little kids together.

We are trying to be more intentional about our time in the evening, but post-bedtime-dates while we are shooing kids back to bed for the first half and talking while in zombie state only goes so far. Our answer? Going out on real, out-of-the-house DATES. Preferably early enough in the evening we are awake enough to converse.

Just... gotta figure out how to do it.

I know we aren't the only couple who struggles with this, so I thought it'd be prudent to write out our process of making it happen. First, we need to figure out WHY we aren't doing it, even though we'd like to.

Why we aren't going out on dates:

• It takes forethought and fore-planning. A lot of forethought. Deciding what we want to do, budgeting for it, planning babysitting. It makes my brain hurt just trying to make it work. Then there is the fact that I keep getting sick and have to change plans so frequently. Making plans seems all the more exhausting as it's not un-likely we will have to change them. 
• Eating out is expensive, and I am not really sure what else to do. 
• Eating out is not only expensive, but basically impossible for me.  There are two places I know I can go, and chipotle ain't romantic.  
• Babysitting? We don't have family nearby, so that means hiring. Honestly, I wouldn't even know who to call to babysit our kids. We aren't in a area now where we know everybody's younger teenage sisters.
• Babysitting? There is exchanging babysitting with friends, but last time we tried that I got sick for a few weeks and couldn't return the favor. I am hesitant to try again.
• It's really hard to budget for them. I know dates aren't about the money, but I honestly don't know what to do without spending quite a bit.
• We're busy, and an evening away from the house means an evening we aren't able to try and keep from drowning in to-dos. 

Great. That was not encouraging. Tomorrow Mark and I are going to go back through our excuses (via e-mail... cause that's how we communicate right now), and figure out how to do them. Somehow. Someway. Someday. Soon.

Intentional Couple Time -Part 2: Post Bedtime Date Ideas

If you are like us, being married with three little kids, you probably don't get out on honest to goodness dates very often. We try not to let that stop us however from spending quality time together on a regular basis. While it certainly isn't as great as a well planned romantic getaway having an after-the-kids-are-asleep-home-date is still helpful and worth taking the time for.

At home date ideas:

• Enjoy dinner and/or dessert together, after the kids are down. We almost always do this (or at least a fun treat), plus a few other things. 
• Play board and card games together. Our personal favorite is King's Cribbage. (btw I promise that isn't an undeclared affiliate link)
• Filling out excel spreadsheets together. About just about anything. Yes, we are nerds. One of my favorites we did was figuring out if it would be better to keep buying houses of increasing value over many years vs. getting a mortgage for the same number of years. Course, that was 5 years of renting ago.
•                                                   CENSORED                                                    
• Designing houses together. Crazy houses with multi-story book cases, unique ways of being efficient, and the occasional monolithic dome. 
• Work on trouble spots together. Romantic? No. But we have better conversations when working together than doing just about any other time.
• Just talking. Preferably not about kids.
• YouTube videos. Preferably educational ones as that leads to us talking. 
• Ted Talks. Same idea as the YouTube videos.
•  Researching something together. Something neither of us know much about, but peaks both our interest.
• Cooking together. Generally not Mark's preference but we have had a few fun times doing it. 
• Doing art together. The one time we did this we both enjoyed simply goofing off with some colored pens and computer paper.
• Exercising together. We actually have been wanting to get into that more, our exercising preferences are pretty different though. 
• Massages.
• Watching a show together. This tends to be our go-to which we are trying to get away from, but it is nice to snuggle and watch something together. Right now we are enjoying the comedy series Malcolm in the Middle (found on netflix) and it cracks both of us up. 
• Play GeoGuessr together. 
• Play Would You Rather? Or other similar games. 
• Sit together eating tostones while brainstorming, and writing out, ideas for at-home-dates.
  
  Do you ever do at-home date nights? What are some things you do together?

Intentional Couple Time - Part 1

One of the biggest things we are trying to be intentional about this year, is spending quality time with each other. We do really great working through survival mode together, and that is how we have spent most of our marriage.

When life "settles" down a bit, we find ourselves wondering what to do with each other. It would be silly to pack the house as we aren't moving, there is a general lack of crying babies to rock well into the night right now, and thanks to working on some our house trouble areas there are fewer tornadoes to clean up after.

This pursuit of spending time together, often leads to getting sucked into a  Netflix vortex. While that is relaxing to a point, it isn't very helpful as far as a deep couple bonding experience. So to fit with the intentional theme of the year we have been discussing ideas of how we can spend more quality time together.

There are five ways we are trying to be more intentional about spending quality time together:

1. Following a show. We do enjoy a good show, and one that comes out weekly allows us to have "our" show that we follow and discuss together. We have watched America's Got Talent almost every year since we have been married, and often have another show or two we follow throughout the year. We are trying to have this in addition to date night. 
2. An almost nightly chance to read a book together. We are currently reading Keep Your Love On by Danny Silk. We haven't consistently had a quiet time together for years, but are trying to get into the habit right before bed (made more possible due to stream lining or evenings). 
3. Date Nights. mostly post-bedtime dates but also the occasional oh-my-goodness-we-actually-got-babysitting-and-can-leave-our-house date nights. Theoretically this is on Wednesday, but tonight we are actually having a post bedtime date, and our last planned activity is to write this post together about ideas on how we can do date nights on the cheap.  
4. Going more places as a family. When we are driving for a while, the kids often talk/play (and fight) among themselves and we get the best chance to talk as we aren't nearly as tired as in the evening.
5. Having friends over. This might seem like an odd one to add here, but it is something we really enjoy doing together. In fact, it is one of our biggest shared interests. We aren't just getting to know our friends better and have a fun night of fellowship, we grow as a couple as well.

Tomorrow we will share some of our post bedtime date ideas.

Community Applied - Part 4

I was going back over my posts about community and felt like something was missing. I outlined what the "ideal" of sorts could look like. However, I don't live in my "ideal" and I honestly don't know how to.

I am trying to be more intentional about relationships which is all community really is. In this post I want to share what I am doing now, and what I am hoping to see it become.

What I am doing now.

In a previous post I talked about "Operation Catchup" where I was being systematic about staying in contact with old friends. That is part of the fulfilment of my relationship goals, but being that they are all far away it is hard to do much more than keep in touch. My life would be rather empty if that's all the friendship connection I had.

The other part is being intentional about creating and building friendships here. I have never had a large number of friends, but I have also never been particularly intentional about making friends either. For the most part all I have ever done was be friends with people who I basically tripped over. I had one kid I was friends with growing up who I just decided that I wanted to be his friend and pursued it. And you know what? It worked. We weren't best buds forever, but it was a real friendship. It requires putting yourself out there, but it can be done.

Here in Maryland I have been doing that more. I've identified people who I admire and respect and am in the process of making a point to be their friend. It's hard to know how close a friend they will be, but I've yet to have anyone just shut me down and not want to connect.

To be more practical here are the GROUNDBREAKING things I'm doing to connect and get to know people:

1.       Texting them periodically

2.       Eating lunch together

3.       Having them over for dinner and games (including their families of course)

4.       Trying to have actual conversations with them when I see them at church

5.       Participate in activities in order to interact (softball, men's Bible study, games at the local game store)

I've done these things in the past on some level, but not as part of an overall goal of finding friends. Time will tell I guess how it will work, but it's going well so far.

What I hope to see.

I want to have a good group of friends. I don't have a specific number in mind. I'll take as many as stick.

I want the relationships to be close and comfortable. Where we are able to share our lives with each other without it being weird, and ask for help without feeling awkward.

It's odd seeing it written like that, but it's what I want.

Have you ever been intentional about making friends? How did it go?

Boogie Monster Messes

We have a closet, the coat closet right by the front door. It has been dysfunctional for a long time. It spills into the living room with its coat sleeve tendrils snaking around challenging any attempts to force it closed.

Well today I took up the shining sword of motivation and ripped the mess out of it en mass and scattered it all over the living room. It had been hanging over me for quite a while and I was dreading it, but today was the day.

Well, fifteen minutes later I had the closet put back together neatly. The door closed nicely, and there was no threat of anything spilling out or grabbing an innocent bystander. It was remarkably quick. I was quite surprised. It's amazing how things can get built up in your mind and become a lot scarier than they actually are.

It was another small victory to add to my gradually growing pile. It is another small thing that will make our lives a little bit easier. It certainly isn't live changing, but if we keep it up it certainly will be.

Costs of Community - Part 3

While it is nice to revel in the potential benefits of community and bemoan the lack of community it is necessary to recognize that there is real cost to being part of a tightly knit community.

Like any kind of relationship, the closer you are to someone the more you open yourself up to being hurt. When you connect you and your families lives up to a close group it is a lot more likely that you will end up in much more painful and uncomfortable situations than you would with a work acquaintance for example. It isn't easy to take that step, and it can be difficult to reach a place where you are willing to take that risk.

The other primary cost is that of priority. When you choose to put make community important it means saying no to a lot of other things. Being open and available for other people means your personal wants and desires sometimes have to take a back seat. It's really like having kids, just on a larger scale.

As I've thought about this it has made me a bit less critical of the lack of community that I see. I still want it, but I realize that there is a lot more to consider than the idealistic "utopia" that community offers. It is also harder to do because as a society we value personal freedom and mobility over close ties to friends and even family.

As much as much as I want it there is a part of me that doesn't want to give up the things that I know I would have to to take part in it. I guess for the most part it is a moot point though, because at least at this point I have yet to come across such a group. And I don't know enough to start one.

Have you ever seen or been a part of a tightly knit community? What was it like? What was good/bad about it?

Schedule Simplification

Life is too crazy right now for super schedules. Kids, health, and Mark's time demanding job makes for a lot of frustration if we try to micro manage our time. Yet, we find that unmanaged time, leads wasted time and un-pursued dreams.

I want to schedule our time, in such a way that a simple bottle of molasses spilled everywhere or the occasional day of not being able to breath without sharp pains doesn't automatically mean a snowball effect of missed to-do's. Because, no matter how many times I rearrange the schedule, messes, meltdowns, and health frustrations are about the only things I can count on happening regularly.

I usually have a bit of time on any given day, I just rarely know when it will be. So, while we have general time slots for some things to take place, I decided to keep household and evening tasks as daily "themes". With the intensity I go after the tasks, and the specific times I do so, depending on the week/day.

Theoretically, that looks like this:

Monday day - wash laundry + super straighten
Monday evening - fold clothes + M&D show night (right now we are watching Mercy Street)

Tuesday day - bath & bed rooms
Tuesday evening - friends over or household extras

Wednesday day - kitchen + closets
Wednesday evening - date night (out when possible, in when not)

Thursday day - living areas + menu plan
Thursday evening - M or D out (alternate)

Friday day - grocery shopping + food prep (or catch up if switching with Saturday)
Friday evening - friends over or freezer cooking

Saturday - catch up and/or family activity

Saturday's "catch up" is important, because as the day's household theme gets interrupted (as we know it will) then I have time to catch up at least some.

Then, time related goals/semi-negotiable "priorities" look like this:

Early morning: supplements + oil pull
Mornings: school/reading + exercise or write (alternating with Mark)
Afternoon: Val time + quiet time + edit and publish post (alternate with Mark) + cook book
Evening: D cooks while M does homework and checklist + family dinner and clean up
Bed time: Pack and/or prep food for the next day + set out clothes + supplements + reading with Mark

This doesn't include things such as family games, snuggle times (beyond "Val time"), art, detox baths (sound silly, but they help me function on rough days!), etc. because we found scheduling those things just leads to frustration as we can rarely do them when we schedule them, but find time (sometimes because they beat out our scheduled "priorities") to do them depending on how the day goes.

Now, if history repeats itself I will need to re-evaluate this multiple times and probably overhaul it in a few weeks, but for now that is what I am wanting our week to look like.

Anyone want to chime in with how they simplify schedules, to allow for somewhat keeping up while knowing things will happen?

Simple Ways to Challenge Yourself to Learn

Life long learning is a critical part of living an intentional life and success. Here is a list of things that we do or have done and are trying to get back into that contribute to our being students of life.

1. Watch TED talks. Preferably not just the ones that are on a topic that already interests you, but every single one as they are released. Watching something you might not gravitate towards is a great way to challenge your brain and expand your experience. I (Mark) like to watch every one, I am sadly behind, but when I keep up with them I find it a great learning experience. 
2. Turn off auto correct. Perhaps, unlike us, you might be astounding at English and spelling. We are far from amazing (numbers are more our thing), but we write a decent bit. Writing without the safety net of auto correct helps us remember how to spell things. We do use spell check, and try to think and remember how something is spelled before simply right clicking it.
3. Looking stuff up. If you make a point of looking out for it, there are frequently things that come up in conversation or that you bump into when online that you don't understand or are not familiar with. I try to remember them when they come up and take a few minutes later to learn a little more about it. It could be anything from what is "nae nae" anyway, all the way to what is the United States history of immigration and how does that relate to the recent Syrian refugee crisis? You won't become an expert, but if you make it a habit you'll understand the world a lot more.
4. In a word, podcasts. Listen to educational podcasts while working on mindless tasks (we're glaring at you dishes). It is a simple way to learn throughout the day, assuming of course there are no kids screaming... alright, so maybe it is only simple some of the time. But taking time during a commute or other non-brain intensive duties to listen to an audio book or podcast is a great way to make better use of that time. There are tons out there that cover anything you could imagine. My favorite though is Michael Hyatt's This Is Your Life. 
5. Edutainment. YouTube is awesome. There are a bunch of really entertaining and informative YouTube channels that allow you to fill some of your mindless Netflix time with things that broaden your understanding of the world. A few of my favorites: Smarter Every Day, Veritasium, CGP Grey, CrashCourse, and Extra Credits. 
6. Read stuff. Read more stuff. Books, articles, magazines, and anything else that looks interesting. It's the best thing ever. Now, some things really aren't worth reading (50 shades of grey comes to mind) so be discerning, but still... read. Find good, entertaining, educating, living things to read, and do so.
7. Answer your kids questions. This goes back to number 3, but is so much more than looking stuff up. Kid's have such a natural curiosity of the world, and can ask some incredibly good questions from that. Everything is a wonder, and parents are a fountain of knowledge in their eyes. So, when they look up and see clouds floating they go to their very own wikipedia/encyclopedia/professor and ask. Now, depending on what you know a decent bit about you might be able to give a really thorough answer, but if you don't have a (good) answer, say so then try and figure it out together. Don't just brush off "silly questions", you might be surprised just how complicated and awe inspiring it is that clouds can float.

Being a student of life is a life long pursuit. The key is not how much you can cram into your day, but just being consistent about it. If you added listening to a 30 minute educational podcast while doing the dishes every day you'd end up listening to 160+ hours of learning in a year. That's the equivalent of more than three university classes. That's not inconsequential.

Little steps over time become great journeys.

Money, And A Look At My Soul

Money is a very interesting thing. It allows for non-like things to be bought and sold and compared in value. It is frequently, if not wisely, used as a way for people to rank their success against others. It allows you to go to turn your time into a milkshake. It is versatile stuff.

Today though I want to explore how money serves as a window into my soul and how I have learned about myself by its flow through my life. I will share three lessons that I have learned (more like am learning) recently by watching my interactions with money.

1. I have been a poor steward. I'm sure you wish from time to time that you had more money. That is certainly true for me. Last year I was bemoaning my perceived deficiency when I  realized something. Numerous times in the Bible there is the theme of stewardship and gain. When you manage something well it has  a habit of growing on you. It got me thinking about how we had been managing money. Now we have never been loose with money, but we also haven't been particularly mindful of it either. So we took Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University with our church. Much of the information we learned I had already known, but it served to motivate me to be a lot more intentional and organized with our finances. I really think it helped pave the way to the theme of this whole blog. I am still learning, and I am striving to direct every dollar to the best use possible.

2. I have relied on money for security. When we first moved here we had a lot of extra expenses and things were tight. Therefore I was not tithing. Now I don't consider that as big an issue as some people, but it wasn't something I was happy about. However, once things settled down I still wasn't. Again, not a massive issue, but it was pointing out an attitude issue that I had. I began to realize that I was holding money in a higher place than I was my trust in G-d. I was trusting that the few hundred dollars a month I was "saving" was going to protect me. So I started tithing. Not because it was a sin/salvation/etc. issue, but because part of me needed to die so my trust and reliance on G-d could grow. So now every time I tithe the physical process of putting the money in the basket is a tangible sacrifice and helps center my attitude around who is really in control.

3. I have claimed money as my own. Today (hence the post) I went to take our van to the dealership to get it inspected so I could update the registration and to get the sliding doors fixed (the bearings have failed in both doors, boo). When the guy got back from the inspection he told me there were a few issues that needed to be addressed to pass the inspection. $1500 later the van had a shiny piece of paper saying it passed and my bank account was smarting from the whiplash (yes all the repairs were necessary and relatively reasonably priced). Needless to say I was not happy about the situation. Particularly since I couldn't get the doors fixed because the money went to the other repairs. As I was coming to terms with it all something popped into my head. As a Christian, I serve G-d. I have given Him my life and my family, and everything else. So if that is in fact true, my car and bank account are His. So really, why do I need to worry about Him fixing His broken car? He is going to provide for me. The money I "lost" because of the repairs isn't going to get in the way of that. So I can rest in the knowledge that He will provide and I don't need to get stressed about it.

I'm sure these seem like much bigger things to me than they do to you just reading them, but I hope you find them helpful.

Semi Minimalist Wardrobe for Kid's Part 2

In part 1 I shared how I came up with what I thought would be an adequate, but simple, wardrobe for the kids. If you have not read that part, I suggest going to read it.

Once I knew where I was going, I just had to take the steps to get there.

1. Divide

I wash laundry once a week, so decided to do par down their wardrobe instead of just folding and putting away. From the massive pile, of newly washed clothes plus anything I didn't need to wash, I took out any clothes that the sharpie found in the wash a few days ago, anything that didn't fit well, anything that was dark and far too comfy with white lint, and almost anything that wasn't on par with season.

Honestly, what was left was pitiful, and clearly showed me why it was a struggle to dress than even among the sea of little shirts, skirts, and pants.

We also went through Christopher's clothes and basically paired down what we didn't like as he had so many usable clothes.

2. Fit Them In

Then I had the task of fitting the paltry pile into the wardrobe model as well as I could. I rearranged, and rearranged some more, so that I would need to purchase as few things as possible to finish the wardrobe.

3. Figure out what you need to get

Since we weren't starting with a lot of practical clothes, we did have some purchasing we had to do. For kids with lots and lots of clothes, simply paring down might be enough.

Even if you have enough clothes to build a wardrobe from, I would suggest changing out socks if socks are a constant struggle for you, like they are for us. Our girls have almost the same foot size, so we are getting rid of all their hard to match random socks and replacing with 20+ pairs of white socks in the exact same style. That way pairing will only be finding two socks not finding the two purple panda socks from the haystack sock stack.

For any partially finished outfit, I wrote down what we needed to complete it (our shopping list is below).

4. Shop

We headed to walmart and target for this, and will hit up target again as we saw socks we wanted there and a second hand store for some dressier clothes for cheaper. Honestly, my kids are rough on clothes and nicer clothes stain as quickly as walmart clothes, so while we try to make high quality purchases (often second hand or from discount stores) we went with straight up cheap this time.

Here is an example of our list, complete with what was low priority.  (Pictured adjustments were made as we shopped).

Valerie Needs: 

20 pairs underwear (low, when potty training)

10+ pairs purple socks (low) 20 pairs of white socks to share with Natalia
shirt to go with rose skirt (velvety red, black, white, or pink) Church outfit

shirt to go with fuzzy dot pants (light green, yellow, pink, or purple)

shirt to go with black dot pants (nothing too dark) Simple pant and shirt outfit
cardigan to go with red shirt and white and black pants 

Natalia Needs:
Skirt/Pant that goes with red shirt 
black or dark brown shirt to go with green jumper A shirt to go with jeans
A pair of jeans
a tunic shirt to go with jeggings (low)
10+ pairs pink socks (low)

Christopher Needs:
Nice Button Down Shirt (low)10+ white socks (low)

Because we weren't going to second hand clothing stores (nothing cheaper than walmart around here) we took the clothes we needed to find matches for with us, which made it much easier!

All in all, getting everything on the list will cost us about $75 (thanks partially to hitting up sales and clearance) which I think is well worth turning their piles of clothes, into a well thought out wardrobe.

One update to the minimalistic wardrobe model I mentioned the other day, we are going to get Valerie 3-4 super basic shirts that can round out most of her outfits when the shirt she is wearing gets messy. She messes up shirts far quicker than pants. 

Semi-Minimalistic Kid's Wardrobe Part 1 - The System

I don't always have nightmares, but when I do, they involve getting the girls dressed.

Than I realize I am awake, and experiencing an annoying if not horrifying, first world problem.

I shared a few days ago about how I was trying to survive streamline my mornings. One of the big things I started doing, was setting out outfits the night before. Doing so allowed me to see one thing very clear: the frustration on getting the girls dressed ISN'T just from them running around, socks that like to hide, and two opinionated fashionistas.

Their wardrobe is a haphazard collection of goodwill finds and hand-me-downs and were completely not thought out as a system. Tons of clothes, and very little practicality.

So, I sat down and thought about what a good semi-minimalist wardrobe system would be for them. Mark and I are encapsulating our wardrobe, with the popular capsule wardrobe model, but it took about 2 seconds for me to realize that model would not be great for kids.

Let's go to exhibit A:
The cardigan

That is a great capsule piece, because it allows layers and stretches fall clothes into winter clothes. But, for my kids, it makes a great napkin/tissue substitute/splatter screen. I am lucky if I get one day out of it before it goes into the hamper, where it sits being unusable until laundry day.

Because of this I decided to go with independent outfits vs. 30-40 pieces that go together for multiple outfits. By independent I mean it includes everything needed for that outfit down to tights (socks, shoes, underwear, coats etc. don't count).

So, the minimalist model I am using for my girl's winter wardrobe is:

• Independent outfits, enough to last at least a week and cover everything from play to church (10 for Valerie, 8 for Natalia)
• A few pairs of pajamas (4 for Valerie as she still wears them out sometimes, 2 for Natalia)
• A formal outfit, if needed (down to shoes)
• Socks to last the week, that are all the same style. We were going to color code by kid, but found white socks much cheaper, so we are getting about 20 pairs of white socks for the girls. Their feet are almost the same size, so it'll work.
• Underwear (10 for Natalia, more for Valerie once we start potty training)
• A pair of play shoes 
• A pair of black dress boots 
• 2 jackets 
• 1 coat
• 1 winter set (hat and gloves)
• Updated addition 3-4 very basic shirts that can stand in to finish most outfits, as Valerie dirties shirts quicker than pants. 

For Christopher, I decided on:

• 8 shirts (casual to button down)
• 4 pairs of pants (including dress jeans)
• 2 pairs of pajamas
• 10 pairs of socks (white, all the same) 
• 10 pairs of underwear 
• 1 complete formal outfit, if needed (down to shoes)
• 1 pair of tennis shoes 
• 1 pair of black boots 
• 2 jackets/over sweaters
• 1 coat 
• 2 winter sets (back up in back pack) 

An adequate, but simple, wardrobe will look different for any family but in theory this will work for us. Tomorrow, I am going to show you how I went about pairing down the excess, and building up, that wardrobe. I also plan on updating in a month or two on rather or not it works for us. I am sure you will be waiting on pins and needles!

Benefits of Community - Part 2

Benefits of Community

As American's we embrace the idea of the self-made man, going it alone, the lone ranger. It goes deep into our cultural psyche. Personal freedom, and self-actualization are touted almost everywhere. Is that the best way to do things though? I mean, I like the idea and it does sound flashy and appealing, but there are trade-offs.

When I was in college it was easy to be part of a community. We were all doing more or less the same thing. We could relate to each other. We were almost all away from family so there were almost no conflicting priorities.

I will explore the costs of community in my next post, but for now I want to focus on what I experienced in college and what I imagine could be gained in my current work-a-day life.

Benefits I saw in college:

1. Friendship - I had friends. Some close, some not so close. But a good group of people that I could be myself with. Who I could talk to about what I thought was important. Who I could have fun with. 
2. Practical Help - At that point it was mostly in the form of getting help with homework, study groups, and even the occasional class file from a previous semester. But it also extended to getting picked up when I wrecked my motorcycle almost an hour from school by a buddy with a truck and trailer. We were near his moms house so we dropped by and she fed us dinner. It took his whole evening up but he didn't mind. 
3. Accountability - We lived close to each other. We knew what was going on in each other's lives. More than once I got called out on stuff that I really didn't need to doing. It kept me in line. 
4. Mentoring - Despite the minimal age difference within our group there was a good deal of mentoring going on. The upper classmen (engineering school so "men" isn't very inaccurate) would give advice and assistance to the lower classmen. It was relatively limited in scope, but it was there. 
5. Combining Skills - The Christian Campus Fellowship that had the house had a weekly "church" service as well as numerous small groups. There were a couple pastors who worked there, but most of the actual work was done by students. They organized events, played music, taught groups, and served in many different capacities. The end result was a rich environment that capitalized on the diverse skills of everyone in the group. 
6. Sharing Economic Resources - Just about every single person I knew in college lived with roommates. So there was tons of sharing. Sharing mowers, sharing cars, sharing clothes even (for the girls). It was common and made sense. Everybody saved thousands of dollars because of it.

Benefits I could see for today:

1. Friendship - This would be much the same, but it has added value because not only is it friendship for you, it is for your whole family. Family-Family friendships are a lot more complex, and I would argue beneficial than simply one-on-one relationships. 
2. Practical Help - Having a young family is tough. There is a lot of extra work that kids bring into the picture. There are a lot of lost sleep, and frazzled nerves. Having people around who are willing to watch the kids so mom can take a nap or for a date night is SOOO helpful. Especially when you don't have the money to hire a babysitter frequently. 
3. Accountability - Again, like friendship this follows the same idea, but it can happen at a deeper level. Leading a family is a big responsibility and having people who can call you out is important to do the best job you can. 
4. Mentoring - The more diverse your community is the more opportunity you have of finding people who have been where you are going. Whether it's in marriage or business/career. So many mistakes can be avoided when you have someone to show you the way. This is probably the biggest hole that I have seen that doesn't normally get filled. You can hire a baby sitter if you don’t have a friend to watch your kids, but having people who are confident enough in their skills to pass them on from a position of confidence is extremely rare, at least in my experience. 
5. Combining Skills - Any time you have a group of people there is going to be certain people with specialized skills and interests. One person my hate doing yard work, but loves teaching guitar. Or likes working on cars, but doesn't know how to set up their wifi. Helping each other out within a group can enrich everyone’s lives and save a ton of money. Plus the general interactions serve to further build up the community. 
6. Sharing Economic Resources - Having families who are willing to share time and resources is a significant economic efficiency. Not everyone needs a truck if someone does and is willing to share. How much time does someone's leaf blower sit being unused? This is a big paradigm shift for most people, but honestly single family homes are super inefficient compared to multi-family homes with shared spaces.

Another item I want to add here at the end is the general sense of belonging. Being part of a group. Being able to trust them and know that they have your back is a wonderful place to be. Contrasted with the stark aloneness of modern American culture community adds a depth of existence that can't be matched.

Brotherhood is built upon shared experiences.

Can Modern Community Exist? Part 1

The past few days I have been thinking about community and in general a culture of intimacy and interdependence. This isn't a new topic for me, but it increasingly is on my mind. Can it exist? Does it exist? What does it look like?

When I was in college I had a relatively large and active community centered around the Christian Campus House there. There were always people around to hang out with and do stuff with. If you ever needed help you could just walk in and say you had a couch that needed hauling and in seconds you'd have a truck and four guys to help you. On a deeper level I had a decent number of friends in the group who I could go to with tough issues and who would support me. It wasn't perfect, but it was great.

It is easy to idealize college, and overall it is hardly representative of "real life" but my time there was really good, and much of that is due to the close community I was in. I made a lot of good friends many of whom I still talk to from time to time. Since then I have talked to a good number of people on this topic and almost to a person they have expressed a desire for that kind of community and belonging. However, I have not seen a real functional community in the family/working world despite having lived so many places.

Through my post-college life I have had good friends. I have felt at home and a part of churches. However, I haven't been a part of a group of people who really did life together. Who lived and participated with each other on closer to a day to day basis than a week to week basis. Who allowed themselves to be dependent on each other. I have not felt like an outsider, but I have not felt like I belonged. This has frustrated me to no end. I wish I knew the answer. I wish I knew how to do it. But I don't.

So my question is, why, if so many people want community, does it not happen? Why does something that seems like it has so much benefit and promise fail to show itself?

Tomorrow I am going to explore the benefits of a close community, so stay tuned.

The Stereotypical Resolution

At the end of last year Debra mentioned to me that she would like it if I started exercising and lost some weight. It had been something that I was aware of but with the craziness of the past year had fallen down the priority list a bit so it just wasn't happening. When she brought it up though I was a little hesitant because there were so many important things that I knew were not receiving adequate attention I didn't want other areas of my life to suffer because I was getting in shape. Thankfully, after taking a holistic view of things over the past couple weeks I finally have a good perspective to know where exercise and fitness fits into my schedule and my priorities.

So how am I going about this? Well, first you need to know my background. I have been in good shape several times. I know how to do it and I have proven to myself that it is possible. The biggest challenge is staying consistent over a long period of time. This blog is specifically for helping me get better at being consistent. So I got the help of a trainer friend of mine to put together a workout program (the small part) and keep me accountable to stay on it (the big part). I'm not going big at least for right now. My regimen consists of three workouts a week focusing on cardio and light weights. The primary goal is to develop consistent activity and make positive progress.

I'd like to eventually get to the point where I was in college or more recently when I was working out with a friend in Missouri (I was 240lbs of mostly muscle), but for now I am content on making consistent small progress.

This isn't anything groundbreaking. None of the stuff I'm doing is for the most part. But if I can make my life a little bit better, be healthier, be more organized, be more motivated, I will be a lot better off in a lot less time than I probably expect.

Taking Control of Your Story

A while ago I (Mark) was listening to a podcast by Michael Hyatt about how our internal narrator affects our daily lives. I highly recommend you listen to it. However, I will summarize what I got out of it here.

As we go throughout our day there is the little internal voice that comments about and weaves the story of what happens to us. It adds context to what happens and presumably why. For example, you are driving to work and a guy cuts you off. The internal voice (which very well may become external, because the guy IS completely insane of course) says that the guy is a jerk and deserves any number of terrible things to happen to him. Now, that may be true that he's a jerk, but then again it may not. Your internal voice does not know anything about the guy or what may have caused his lapse in proper driving etiquette. Similarly for ourselves, we can have a very negative narrative for why we do what we do or for who we are. Things like, "man I'm an idiot" or "what kind of loser says that?" or "my wife/husband hates me".

We think these things reflexively, but they very well may have no bearing on reality at all. And even if they do, that doesn't mean that it is helping us by repeating these negative story lines to ourselves over and over. It is really self sabotage. In the podcast Michael Hyatt outlines a five step process to take control of your internal narrator. To turn what potentially is a damaging cycle of criticism into something that is beneficial.

1. Recognize the voice in your head.
2. Jot down what the voice is saying.
3. Evaluate whether this story is empowering.
4. Write down a different story.
5. Start telling yourself the new story.

 Even doing just step one has been a big step for me. Realizing that the voice is not speaking from some deep well of universal truth and that I can identify it and control it's message is potentially life changing.

I can change my story.

Operation Stream Line Morning

Mornings. Blech.

Monday mornings? Double blech.

Sunday mornings? Triple blech.

Why do Saturday mornings even have to exist? It's not like Mark has to get to work (usually) or Christopher has to get to school. Blech. Blech. Blech. Blech.

I am NOT a fan of mornings. Yet, they roll around, every... single... morning. 

When Christopher first started going off to school, I had grand plans for mornings. They involved art time, detox baths + quiet time, exercising, capped off with a full supplement and juicing routine before I got Christopher to school.

That lasted about a week.

Now I count it a good morning if I don't have to go to the school twice (once to drop Christopher off, once to drop of his backpack, and should have gone a third time to take his homework I had taken out to check and left on the table).

Just like I wrote a few days ago about setting evenings up to help promote a good night sleep, I am attempting to streamline my mornings so I can enjoy as much as that good night sleep as possible while still getting the early-mid morning priorities. I am far from in danger of getting too much sleep.

I would love early-mid mornings that involve exercise and quiet times, but it frankly ain't happening. So, what NEEDS to happen?

Christopher needs to get to school, with his homework packed, his breakfast and lunch packed and him dressed. The girls and I need to get dressed and eat breakfast (usually after we take Christopher to school as he eats breakfast there). Mark needs to get to work with breakfast and lunch packed.

Ideally we would also take our supplements (probiotics and fish oil for the kids, and too many to list for me) before heading off for school. Right now it isn't happening, but is important especially for Natalia and me. I don't want lack of probiotics to undo any of the progress she had made in gut health!

I already pack breakfasts and lunches for Mark and Christopher the night before, so that takes care of those two necessities.

That leaves "early"-mid-morning duties to getting dressed, supplements, and breakfast for the girls and me. Honestly, it isn't much but most mornings I am in pain due to poor digestion for the first hour or two. So, it feels like a lot and I need to streamline as much as possible.


Ways I Plan To Streamline Mornings:

Lay out clothes. The process of getting dressed is huge, but in the evening when my brain is working, I am not in pain, and kids aren't screaming, I can set clothes out and they are ready to put on. Now, if only I can teach the shoes to stay put overnight so they will be there when we wake up. Those things have it out for me.

Prep breakfast foods ahead of time. We are mostly eating sweet potatoes (baked ahead of time, and eaten cold or reheated), or a quick to cook vegetable + breakfast meat + smoothie right now. I made smoothie packs to help make them easier, and froze 6 lbs of sausage patties (there aren't store bought ones we can all have). I plan on trying to prepping other breakfast proteins ahead of time, to try and get more variety. I am also a huge fan of overnight and make ahead breakfasts.

Pack breakfasts and lunches ahead of time, for those going to school and work and for the girls and me on Thursday (library) and sometimes on Friday (grocery shopping). I am already doing this mostly, but don't always pack breakfast for the girls and I when it would be very helpful.

Supplements... not sure how to streamline them. It thought about divvying them up but that just seams like a way to streamline Valerie eating them all. Maybe I can put a reminder in my phone to remind myself to actually give them to the kids and myself.

Try and figure out a way to wake up with less stomach pain, or at least figure out a way to shorten it's visit. Not sure what that looks like yet, but hopefully I can! It starts with me trying to be better about actually taking my digestion aids.

Now just to figure out how to do all those things I wish I was doing in the morning.

Operation Catch Up

Over the past 11 years I have lived in 10 different places in four states (one of them two different times). I don't regret it at all, but it has meant that I have left a string of friends with whom my relationships, due to time and distance, have faded. I rarely have many friends at one time, but after that many moves it has built up.

Friends are valuable and I don't like just throwing away the relationships when one or both of us move away. I like them all and I have tried to keep up with them to some extent over the years. One of my priorities for this year is to bring intentionality to my relationships. So I decided to make a system for keeping up with my friends.

First I made a list of everyone I could think of through all my journeys over the past decade that I had developed a meaningful relationship with. Then over the past week I've been contacting them a couple a day. Sending them texts, or emails, and even a couple old fashioned letters. Whatever communication medium would be best suited for that person. I'm setting reminders to go through the process again periodically in order to continue the process of staying in touch with them.

I'm sure I've missed a few people, but I'll add them over time as I remember them. The responses I've gotten though have been very encouraging. Good friends are hard to find and it's a shame to let them go just because geography got in the way.

As the name of this blog suggests we have been making a point to be more intentional about our lives this year. I've been working on formulating my goals and areas of focus to try to help me prioritize what I spend my time on during the day. I had not planned on doing this, but I found myself writing a checklist yesterday for when I got home from work. All the most important things that I needed to do. I am trying to learn to focus and manage my time better so I figured that would help.

Here's the list:

1. Clean kitchen

2. Supervise kids

                a. Clean living room

                b. Clean den

                c. clean hall

                d. Clean son's room

                e. Clean girl's room

3. Son's homework

                a. Tuesday's (I missed a day)

                b. Wednesday's

4. Move clothes/dressers (new furniture yay!)

5. Vacuum

                a. Girl's room

                b. Our room

6. Play Candy Land

7. Watch Star Wars (Episode II)

8. Have everyone write letters to Grandma

9. Have everyone write letters to Nana

Not everyone's letters got written, and we only watched half of Star Wars, but everything else on the list got done and I was able to stay focused the entire time. I have to say it was a real success. I'm going to start doing this more often for sure.

As you can see looking through the list there are a number of different priorities peeking through. Taking care of the house is obvious, but I am trying to put priority on spending time playing with the kids, and investing in other relationships. It doesn't take a lot of time, but even from the few days that I have been trying it I've already seen real results.

Mark Started Whole30

In order to lose some weight Mark started a whole30 on Monday. Usually it would be the type of thing we did together, but my diet is already so limited I honestly didn't want to commit to not having honey over the next 30 days (pretty much the only non-whole30 thing I am eating right now.)

The other reason I am not joining him is last time we did it together he lost 16 lbs and I lost 4. I was so upset, we weren't on speaking terms for about 1.3 seconds until I declared we would never do a whole30 together again.

I wasn't serious, but in hind site seems like a good enough reason to keep eating panna cottas, while he is at work, and my honey-sweetened brews.

Why Whole30:

• There are a lot of diets out there, and I haven't really ever seen one for weight loss that I liked better than whole30. 
• We know it works as we have done it before.
• It's isn't necessarily low-carb even with being grain and sweetener free. 
• No calorie counting! As someone who thinks plenty of healthy fats is important and have seen the healing powers of them, I am just not a fan of counting calories as fats often suffer.
• It focuses on eating nourishing foods, and not just following a list of rules. For a short period replacing comfort foods with new allowed foods is out. 
• It goes by the three large meals vs. the several small meals model which I have always preferred. 
• It's only for thirty days. Sure, you can do more rounds of it if you'd like, but it isn't saying you should always eat that way (i.e. not replacing comfort foods with healthier options).
• It is super easy for our meals to be whole30, just leave out the honey. Less work for me!

He is hoping to lose weight, and jumpstart eating less junk away from home. I am hoping that it will help him in those goals, but also am hoping it can help encourage me to stop the late night snacks with Mark. We have gotten into the habit of eating food right before going to bed whenever we are hanging out. That can affect sleep, and digestion, and honestly I don't need anything that even remotely gets in the way of either of those.

I also am looking forward to getting back into the habit of packing him his breakfast and lunch every day, something that I have not been so great about since Val was born and since feeding the girls became so complicated.

Attacking Our House- Or Rather It's Trouble Spots

Take a journey with me in your imagination. You probably shouldn't close your eyes too much though or reading this will get hard.

Imagine a time when you had the entire house clean. And I mean clean clean with everything put away correctly, and no dirty laundry mountains hiding in the bottom of your closet. Bask in that memory a moment. Wasn't it great? It made you feel content and relaxed. You probably did a few things you almost never do afterwards because you were so relaxed. Tea in front of the fire, like an eternal Norman Rockwell post card. Ok, maybe that's a bit much but you get where we're going.

Maybe you don't have to remember that as being three houses and two children ago, but around here we do. Our house is pretty much always in total state of C.H.A.O.S (can't have anyone over syndrome). We spend far too much time managing stuff stuffed into other stuff while stepping over other stuff.
It frequently looks like we keep a pet tornado, and that isn't even true. Valerie is allergic to them. But, fact that remains that it looks like we do, and that does hint at an underlying truth. The truth that our house is not organized well and is setting not just our kids, but all of us up for the messy failure at the task of keeping house.

We are total unrelenting nerd's, so when it comes to the 1,653th time we tell the kids to clean up their clothes that day, or see the pantry has barfed all over the counter tops again we start trying to thinking of systems. Not just more storage, but smarter systems and less stuff.

It is time to not just sigh over the trouble spots again, but identify the weak spots and attack armed with the nerd weapon of choice- Excel Spreadsheets. 

The first task is to identify the enemy, the weak spots, the trouble areas. Would the pantry barf less often, if it it wasn't stuffed to overflowing with bottles on the brink of falling?  We have created and categorized trouble spots, and now we eliminate them- showing no mercy.

Today, we are getting a cabinet to take care of four trouble spots - our games (which live temptingly within kids reach), our art supplies (which are in the computer desk), our computers (which would like their home back), and some of our books (which are in suffocating in boxes while games take up shelf space).

We are also getting a dresser for the girls, one that will be big enough for their clothes so that the clothes won't jump for air the moment drawers are open. There is one for Christopher too, because plastic drawers just aren't cutting it (thanks Grandma Gay for the Christmas money, we are using it well.)

And tomorrow...

Tomorrow we're going to move on to step TWO! Which is prioritize the other trouble spots by order of hassle, cost of systems that work, and priority.

Watch out house....

Aaaattaaaack!!!!!!!!!